the saddest part about all this is that the thought of you still haunts me at night.

honestly though, it’s fucking eating me up inside and idk what to do about it. make it stop.

Honestly though, i don’t even know why I cared about you so much. You were so irrelevant I still don’t understand why I put in so much effort to being your “friend”. I don’t wanna be spiteful or vengeful but I really hope you get your shit together and realize what you’re doing is wrong. Or just continue to be the grimy ass typical dude you are.

Stepping stone.

Honestly, these last couple days have been really weird territory. Lots of ups and downs and turn arounds, lots of surprises and lots of bull shit. I’m genuinely glad these past couple days happened because it really did shine some light for me. I’m done trying to be a people pleaser, I’m done trying to be the one that always initiates hang outs and conversations, and I’m absolutely done trying to fix the unfixable. This definitely feels like a never ending cycle but fuck it. I’m doing me now. I’ve fucked up so many times and there’s so many things that I wished never happened. But these past couple days have taught me to start living and stop wishing. Start doing and stop dwelling. Start grinding and stop overthinking. Nowhere to go but up from here.

personal motivate